


The Tale of the Fox-Wife and the Incredibly Annoying Whatever

by Rethira



Category: Subarashiki Kono Sekai | The World Ends With You
Genre: M/M, Mythical Beings & Creatures
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-16
Updated: 2014-08-16
Packaged: 2018-02-13 09:52:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,899
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2146308
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rethira/pseuds/Rethira
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sometimes, a delivery is just a delivery. Other times, a delivery turns into dating the most annoying person this side of Pork City.</p><p>(in which Neku is a long suffering kitsune, and Joshua is himself)</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Tale of the Fox-Wife and the Incredibly Annoying Whatever

**Author's Note:**

> that title is subject to change haha i can't think of anything else that doesn't involve 'what does the fox say'

Neku has two tails before he makes his first successful delivery, and he’s honestly truly relieved for the work, because it has been getting boring as hell lounging around in shrines for the last however many years it’s been. Most of his litter-mates – not like, _litter_ litter-mates, because Neku was his parents’ only child and it didn’t look like that was going to change any time soon – have already been taking messages for Inari-sama for _decades_ , but the first delivery Neku ever went on ended... _badly_. There’s a reason _his_ shrine is in the middle of nowhere and gets maybe one or two visitors every decade.

It’s the same reason Neku doesn’t talk to the other _kitsune_ , but they all just call him _difficult_ and leave him to tuck his two tails up around his nose and bite the hands that try to feed him.

And then one day Shiki, who only has one tail and tends to jump at loud noises, drops a scroll in front of him and says, “This is for Hanekoma Sanae.” She flicks her tail, and runs away before Neku can snap at her, and well. This is what he’s been waiting for. This is what he’s wanted, isn’t it?

He stretches, yawning, then delicately picks the scroll up and goes to find this Hanekoma person.

 

Being in Shibuya makes Neku’s fur stand on end – Mr H says it’s just all the ozone in Shibuya, but that doesn’t make sense at all, and anyway, Shibuya doesn’t _smell_ of ozone – but it’s better than being in the shrine. Or really, just about anywhere Neku can think of. Besides, it doesn’t bother him so much to take his human shape, and it’s nice to blend in.

Also, he can sit in Mr H’s shop without people staring at him and asking why there’s a _fox_ in here. It doesn't even matter that he can't hide his ears or his tails, because there are like three people in Shibuya who _might_ be able to see them, and they sure aren’t patrons of Wild Kat.

Neku points this out to Mr H, but all he gets in return is one of Mr H’s weird smiles and a donut. A very good donut, to go with the very good coffee Mr H lets Neku drink sometimes, but it still irritates Neku, because Mr H treats him like a kid and Neku hasn’t been a kid in a long, long time.

Sometimes though, _sometimes_ Neku misses being able to curl up with his tails over his nose and know that no-one was going to poke him or pick him up or interact with him in any way. Invariably on those days, he walks out of Shibuya, far enough that his fur settles down again, and then he sneaks back into the shrine and naps until someone finds him and says, “Inari-sama would like you to deliver this.”

They don’t even bother telling him who it’s for anymore, because it’s always for the same person, and Neku knows that just from the way the scroll smells of coffee, cats and dried blood.

Neku hasn’t bothered to ask why Mr H smells like dried blood. He figures he’ll find out eventually, and if he doesn’t then it probably doesn’t matter anyway.

 

The first time Neku meets Joshua, he’s come back from one of his rare visits to his shrine and hasn’t bothered to change shape. Also, it’s been raining, and the scroll he’s carrying is starting to taste more like wet ink than coffee. The door’s shut and Neku considers shifting for all of five seconds – instead, he scratches at the door until it opens, and then he runs inside and hops delicately up onto Mr H’s counter, where he proceeds to drip in silence.

“I didn’t know you were pen pals with Inari-chan,” Joshua says. Not that Neku knows it’s Joshua at the time – instead, he glares a little malevolently at what appears to be a half grown human child until Mr H drops a towel over Neku’s head.

“Just keepin’ my ear to the ground, boss,” Mr H says, scruffing Neku’s fur dry.

The kid titters – the towel slips on Neku’s head and he gets to see the kid reach over the counter and hug Mr H, and it makes Neku’s hackles rise, and then the kid runs out into the rain and it’s just him and Mr H again.

“He’s a good kid,” Mr H says, like Neku even cares, but then he drops a mug of steaming coffee in front of Neku and lets Neku sit on the counter and drink it until his fur dries.

 

The fifth time Neku meets Joshua, Joshua leans over the counter and grabs one of Neku’s tails and _yanks_.

“Oh, so they are real,” Joshua comments, over the sound of Neku’s protesting yowl.

“Of course they are, jackass!” Neku shouts, before punching him in the jaw and running outside.

 

Joshua still has an alarmingly purple bruise on his chin three days later; Neku’s not entirely sure it’s not make up, or just one of Joshua’s quirks, but Joshua smiles brightly when Neku comes in and says, “Welcome back, dear,” and then continues, “Mr H isn’t in right now, but I’ll be happy to take a message for him.”

Neku folds his arms. Both his tails flick, and his ears flatten a little to his head. “I’ll just wait,” he says, and goes to cram himself in his normal corner. It’s just him and Joshua in anyway, and the sign on the door says ‘CLOSED’ so it’s probably not the best avoidance tactic ever, but whatever.

Less than five minutes later, Joshua is perched on Neku’s table and staring avidly at Neku’s ears.

“They’re real too, I bet,” Joshua says. Neku thinks _duh_ extremely loudly, and Joshua starts giggling. “You’re very cute,” he continues airily. “Not as cute as me, but still pretty cute.”

After a long moment of silence, Neku says, “I don’t like you.”

Joshua just laughs.

 

The bruise is gone by the time Neku next sees Joshua. Mr H looks up and grins when Neku comes in, and says, “Haven’t seen you around much lately, Tails,” and laughs when Neku’s tails flick irritably.

“I’ve been busy,” Neku says.

Joshua giggles infuriatingly from his corner, and he isn’t even looking at Neku but Neku just _knows_ that Joshua’s laughing at him.

Mr H blessedly ignores Joshua and asks, “The usual?” He starts making it before Neku even replies, and Neku slinks away from the counter, keeping an ear pointed in Joshua’s direction just in case the kid tries to sneak up on him again.

Joshua actually _does_ ignore Neku for nearly the entire rest of Neku’s visit – it isn’t until Neku’s halfway out the door that Joshua says, “Oh Neku? If you’re leaving I’ll come with you!” Before Neku can protest, Joshua’s glued himself to Neku’s side and steered him out the door. Then he claps his hands and asks, “Where are we going then?”

Neku sputters. “ _We’re_ not going anywhere! _I’m_ going back ho- to the shrine!”

“Perfect!” Joshua exclaims. “I’ll come with you!”

“No,” Neku says, and repeats the entire way back to the shrine, and then into the shrine, and past all the other _kitsune_ until finally Neku just gives up and goes back to his fox shape and bites Joshua’s shin.

Joshua _yelps_ , and then picks Neku up by the scruff of his neck and says, “That wasn’t very nice, Neku. But I forgive you. Next time, you can walk _me_ home!”

 

Shiki sits down next to Neku, tucking her black furred feet up against her chest and says, “You’ve been happier lately, Neku.”

“No I haven’t,” Neku denies, instinctively.

“Nu-uh, you really have! Ever since you started making deliveries. I think it’s great!” She grins, and her tails wag like a dog’s.

Neku snorts, and shifts so his tails cover his nose better. “You think everything is great,” he mumbles, voice muffled by his fur.

Shiki huffs. It makes all her fur stand on end. “You’re so grumpy! One day everyone will stop calling you Neku and start calling you Mr Grumpypants and then you’ll be sorry!” Neku starts laughing, and Shiki stares down at him, wide eyed. “Neku! You laughed!”

Neku stops immediately. “No I didn’t. You’re hearing things.”

“You did! I did hear you laugh! See, I knew it, those deliveries _are_ making you happier,” Shiki barks, leaping to her feet and running around in a tight circle. She pauses and looks at Neku, her look turning calculating. “ _I_ heard that you came here with a _human_. _I_ heard that he was a very cute human too.”

Neku jumps to his feet, fur bristling. “That was- that wasn’t _anything_! You don’t know anything!” He hops over Shiki’s head and runs out the shrine, and her laughter follows close behind him.

 

Joshua physically drags Neku out of WildKat, hand tight like a vice around Neku’s, and as the door swings shut behind him, Mr H calls, “Be careful out there, kiddos!”

“Let _go_ ,” Neku says, urgently, trying to tug his hand free. “I’ll bite you!”

Joshua laughs. “My, my, Neku, I had no idea you were that eager to taste me.”

Neku can feel himself going red. “I didn’t say that! You’re putting words in my mouth!”

Joshua smirks evilly. “That’s not the only thing I’m going to put in your mouth,” he says.

Neku stares right into Joshua’s evil, _evil_ eyes, and says, “Fuck you.”

Joshua’s smirk gets _wider_. “Maybe later, dear,” he replies, lightly, before abruptly yanking Neku into an underpass.

Neku finally asks, “Where are we going?”

“I told you last time,” Joshua says, pouting, “today you’re walking _me_ home.”

“... you live _here_?” Neku asks, frowning. “I thought humans lived in houses.”

“Silly,” Joshua clucks, “who ever said I was human?”

 

Mr H won’t tell Neku anything about what Joshua _really_ is, although he does say that Joshua _used_ to be human. “A long time ago though, Tails,” Mr H says, “so don’t get your hopes up.”

Neku scowls at the nickname and asks, “Is he dead then?” Humans don’t live that long, do they?

Mr H laughs loudly, startling his handful of other customers, and shakes his head. “Only technically,” he finally says, like that’s any sort of answer at all.  
 _  
Joshua_ won’t say what he is either, and there’s _no way_ Neku’s going to ask Inari-sama or anyone else back at the shrine, so he gives it up as a dumb mystery that he doesn’t really care about anyway. Because he doesn’t care about Joshua, no matter what Shiki thinks – and anyway, she’s one to talk about humans! _Everyone_ knows about her and that human girl, the one whose appearance she stole! At least _Neku_ hasn’t taken up with an _actual_ human- _not_ that he’s doing anything with _Joshua_!

Mr H pokes Neku in the forehead and says, “You keep frowning like that you’re gonna get wrinkles, Tails.”

“I am _not_ ,” Neku growls.

Behind him, Joshua says, “Don’t worry, Neku, I’ll love you even if you _do_ get wrinkles!”

Neku’s ears flatten against his head, and Mr H starts laughing again, because he loves to witness Neku’s pain. “I hate you,” Neku mutters.

Joshua laughs.

 

“Let me get this straight,” Neku says, staring at the statue. “You dragged me all the way across Shibuya, in the _opposite direction_ to the shrine, just so we could come and stare at some dumb statue of a dog.”

“Yep!” Joshua says, perkily. “Don’t you like Hachiko?”

Neku’s silence speaks volumes. Joshua pouts, and grabs Neku’s hand. “Fine, let’s go somewhere else then. I know a place that does _great_ ramen! You like ramen, don’t you Neku?”

“Huh? I guess-”

“Wonderful!” Joshua exclaims, yanking on Neku’s arm and dragging him nearly all the way to A-East. He stops outside a sign that proclaims _Ramen Don_. “Here we are!”

The man inside welcomes them in, and then greets Joshua _by name_ and asks, “The usual for you two?”

“Mm-hm,” Joshua nods, dragging Neku down to the table right in the back. “Ken Doi does the best ramen in Shibuya,” he says, looking smug.

Neku finally folds his arms and mutters, “If you say so.”

He’s _very_ upset to find that it really _is_ the best ramen he’s ever had, and gets even grumpier when Joshua smirks at him and says, “I did tell you, Neku.”

 

“He took you to _Hachiko_?” Shiki asks.

Neku rolls his eyes. “ _Yes_. And then he made me eat ramen-”

“He took you out to _dinner_?” Shiki asks again.

“What? No, it wasn’t even late-”

Shiki looks significantly at her human girlfriend. “That sounds like a date to me,” Eri says.

Neku huffs. “Who even asked you?”

“Well, Shiki did, and I’m beginning to see why. You are totally dating this guy- what did you say his name was? Joshua?”

Neku growls a little, because he can. “Don’t just say it so casually. You might summon him or something.”

“Don’t be stupid, Neku. Saying his name won’t make him appear,” Shiki huffs.

“That’s what _you_ think,” he grumbles.

“Yes, that is what I think! And just to prove it, I’m going to say his name a lot. Joshua, Joshua, Joshua, Joshua! See-”

“You rang?”

It is _immensely_ satisfying to see Shiki jump three feet straight up into the air, her fur puffed out like a startled cat. It’s less satisfying to see Joshua’s smirking face looking down at him, but Neku can live with that. Maybe.

“I told you,” Neku says, when Shiki lands beside him.

Joshua sits down next to Neku and strokes his fur. “So, Neku, who are your friends?”

Neku starts to protest, “They’re _not_ my-”

“I’m Shiki,” Shiki interrupts, transforming into her human form, “and this is my girlfriend, Eri!”

“Don’t _talk_ to him,” Neku hisses.

Joshua pokes his nose, and says, “Don’t be rude, dear. I want to meet your friends!”

“They don’t want to meet you,” Neku mutters.

“Actually,” Eri says, “I do. Shiki’s told me about how happy you’ve made Neku lately, and I think that’s great!”

“I am _not_ happy because of this guy,” Neku argues, but no-one pays any attention to him.

 

Joshua’s actual home is weird. There are fish in the floor and a counter, like at WildKat, but instead of coffee behind it, there’s just a lot of sake. Everything smells of ozone and water, and then Joshua opens some sort of secret panel and reveals a huge, empty room that only has a throne in it.

“And I thought you were an asshole before,” Neku mutters.

“I heard that,” Joshua says, airily. “Now come over here, I have something else to show you.”

The something turns out to be what it feels like to have Joshua’s tongue in his mouth. Neku bites it and scrambles away from Joshua, and Joshua doesn’t even look _hurt_ , he just smiles as widely as he ever does.

“What was _that_?” Neku asks.

“I should hope you know a kiss when you get one,” Joshua replies, tartly, getting up and crowding Neku back against the wall.

“B-but _why_?” Neku asks, because nothing-

“Because I _like_ you, obviously,” Joshua replies, and then he kisses Neku again, pinning Neku against the wall and it’s... actually... kind of nice.

Neku’s eyes flutter shut, and he tilts his head a little, and Joshua makes a half-amused, half-pleased noise, and wraps an arm around Neku’s waist and- wow. Huh.

It turns out that Joshua is halfway tolerable when he’s not talking.

 

Joshua _insists_ that these people really _are_ his friends, even though they’re all easily twice his age, one of them radiates pure malevolence, and another one is staring at Joshua like he’d like to throttle him – Neku can relate.

“... and these are Uzuki and Kariya,” Joshua says, pointing at his last two ‘friends.’ A pink haired girl putting on more lipstick, and a guy sucking a lollipop. Neither look any happier to be here than any of Joshua’s other ‘friends.’

“Uh-huh,” Neku says, shifting a little uncomfortably.

Joshua claps his hands happily. “Everyone, I’d like you to meet Neku, my fox-wife!”

All of Joshua’s ‘friends’ stop what they’re doing. Woman with the lipstick turns so sharply she gets lipstick on her cheek, and lollipop dude almost _inhales_ his lollipop.

Neku breathes out very slowly, and then very meaningfully stands up, dumps the tea kettle and its contents all over Joshua’s head, and then walks out.

 

The next time he walks into WildKat, it’s just in time to hear Joshua saying, dreamily, “... and then he poured hot tea all over me.”

“You deserved it,” Neku says, grumpily.

Joshua spins around, smiling, and says, “Uzuki almost died laughing – again! And I haven’t seen Sho-chan for _days_ , and I think Megu-chan would like to set you on fire for insulting me.” Joshua hugs Neku. “It went _perfectly_.”

“Uh- _huh_ ,” Neku replies.

Joshua presses a little kiss to Neku’s lips, spins around to say, “See you later, Sanae,” and then drags Neku out of WildKat for the umpteenth time.

“I was on a delivery,” Neku protests, half-heartedly.

“Finish it later,” Joshua says, tangling his fingers with Neku’s. “Pay attention to _me_ now.”

“You’re such work,” Neku grumbles.

“You love me anyway,” Joshua announces.

And maybe, just maybe, Neku thinks, _yeah, I do_.

**Author's Note:**

> i tried to get Beat and Rhyme in this, but couldn't figure out a good way to do it
> 
> they're both human, and, rest assured, Neku does eventually make friends with them
> 
> (Beat freaks out when he first sees Neku's ears and tails)


End file.
